I'm sure Jason Mraz Wrote this song under totally different circumstances. The lyrics grabbed at my soul while eating dinner tonight...
The lyrics say it all. Read for yourself. I hope you like the song as much as I do. I could listen all night, you know since I am not sleeping.
Sleeping to Dream by Jason Mraz
I'm dreaming of sleeping next to you I'm feeling like a lost little boy in a brand new town
I'm counting my sheep and each one that passes is another dream to ashes
and they all fall down.
And as I lay me down tonight,
I close my eyes, what a beautiful sight
Sleeping to dream about you
And I'm so tired of having to live without you
But I don't mind.
Sleeping to dream about you and I'm so tired
I found myself in the riches (Your eyes, your lips, your hair.) And you were everywhere
I woke up in the ditches. I hit the light and I thought you might be here
but you were nowhere. (You were nowhere)
Well, you were nowhere at home.
As I lay me back to sleep
Lord I pray that I can keep
Sleeping to dream about you
And I'm so tired of having to live without you
Well, I don't mind
Sleeping to dream about you and I'm so tired
(Just a little a lullaby to keep myself from crying myself to sleep at night.)
Sleeping to dream about you
I'm so tired of having to live without you
Well, I don't mind
Sleeping to dream about you and I'm so tired
What I wouldn't give to wake up one day and find this all to be just a very, very, bad dream... What I wouldn't give to watch all four of my children playing together. For now, I guess I'll just try to picture my sweet boy perfectly healthy and happily playing with the angels.
Maybe the angels will bless me with a whisper tonight. Starlight, star bright, first star I see tonight. I wish I may, I wish I might, have this wish I wish tonight...
To those who follow along on my journey,
I am so thankful for your presence in my life, near and far. Would you help me? Cherish those who are near and dear to you tonight. Give them an extra kiss and make each and every moment count. Some have it all and don't even realize what is right in front of them... I petition your prayers tonight for those who are facing tough times and especially for those of us who sleep to dream of our precious children....
With a Grateful Heart,
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Hello Spring
Things have been really crazy in our house again in recent weeks. All of the kids have been sick with one thing or another. There have been many busy days and sleepless nights too. I'll be totally honest and admit that I've been having a lot of sad days lately as well. Par for the course I guess...
A fellow blogger posted a similar post about welcoming spring and saying goodbye to some winter favorites. I'd thought I'd join in on the fun. I haven't posted for a really long time, so I thought this would be an easy way to jump back in.
The other blogger had a fun font and fun spring colors too. Well I'm too tired to figure all of that out without messing up my main settings, so this will have to do for now.
It is spring! Each day more and more signs of warmer days are popping up everywhere. I see a tremendous difference even from just this weekend.
So Hello spring! Goodbye winter of 2010. Here are my favorite memories from this past winter.
Favorite Memory
Hands down, this would be the night that I had the opportunity to sit still and watch the snow falling to the ground. It was absolutely beautiful! I distinctly remember a peace that washed over me in that moment, a peace like I had never felt before. I have certainly been in such turmoil that I almost didn't know what to do with myself. I was giddy with joy! It was refreshing and welcomed. I remember feeling so overwhelmed with that very peace that I could barely keep it to myself. My husband allowed me to just sit beside the window and stay in that peaceful state with the snow for hours. It was a true gift and I will never forget that night as long as I live.
Favorite Song
I love music. It has been a big part of my life for a long time. We all have those songs that take us back to moments in time that are deep in our minds.
If forced to choose only one song to capture the feelings of this winter, I would have to say Only You by David Crowder.
Favorite T.V. Show
I really like Brothers and Sisters and House Hunters.
Favorite Food Out
Eggs Benedict. Not healthy I know, but oh so good. I never make them at home for myself so it is a nice treat.
Favorite Food Homemade
Linguine with White Clam Sauce
Variety of homemade soups
Shrimp and Grits
Favorite Purchase
A charm that has my word of the year hand stamped on it to remind me on a daily basis to "Let Go". It is helping to be able to hold the charm in my hands and rub my fingers over the words during the challenging moments that come my way. I also see the reflection of myself in the mirror wearing the word and I can now associate myself with that phrase and the true deep desire to "Let Go" of so much in my life...
Favorite Drink
I discovered Sipping Chocolate this year! MMMMmmm
Favorite Event
This winter the events that really stand out the most in my mind are the everyday, ordinary moments. I loved watching life unfold and discovering the everyday miracles that were right before my eyes. I feel like I didn't miss a moment and nothing went unnoticed by these new eyes. Many, but not all, of these moments were centered around my precious children, husband, extended family, friends, and people who enter my life for one reason or another. I am in awe...
If I had to name a few "big" events...
letting go and letting God...oh what an eye opener! He has shown me some amazing things this winter.
the blizzard of 2010-magical moments for my family. enough said.
watching the Winter Olympics in Vancouver
a holiday concert and yummy late night dinner and scrappin' with JC (girl time which was long overdue, it snowed, and I ate my favorite meal too :)
getting pampered beyond belief to attend the Casting Crowns concert with some very special friends and prayer warriors. What a night! It was so awesome to be alongside of so many people woshipping the Lord all at the same time! You are a gem SR! JN and KT, I am grateful you were both there to be a part of that memory in my heart.
planning and preparing a very special Valentine dinner for families that were in need of love and compassion. That night will remain close to my heart forever...
many others are to thank for helping to make that event possible
loving others
gosh...there are so many and I'm only supposed to name one!
I couldn't live without...
Well, I really don't like this question to be honest. I know...lighten up, it's a silly questionnaire with simple answers. Not for me. Yes, it is fun to document some feelings about the months that have passed to remember this person that I am in this very moment today. No, it is still not an easy question to answer. I have learned to live without the very thing that is most important to me, my child, my own flesh and blood. Not much else, tangibly speaking, matters anymore. The rest that really does matter, I have learned, are not under my control either. I am not in control of whether I get to live with or without them either. I have learned to cherish this moment today, it is all I have. I have learned to be at peace with that. I think. It is what it is...
Maybe this question was a little closer to the surface and not so deep. What items are important to you and are part of your daily life? (Aside from God and my family)
My bible
My devotional books
My camera
laptop
coffee and seltzer water
music
something on my person that incorporates all four of my children
So, now it is your turn. Let me know your favorites from this past winter season. Leave a comment here, e-mail me, write to me, call me. It will be the sunshine of my day.
I promise not to stay away for long. I've been writing all along and will post more to come. I have lots to say about this topic on "favorite things".
A fellow blogger posted a similar post about welcoming spring and saying goodbye to some winter favorites. I'd thought I'd join in on the fun. I haven't posted for a really long time, so I thought this would be an easy way to jump back in.
The other blogger had a fun font and fun spring colors too. Well I'm too tired to figure all of that out without messing up my main settings, so this will have to do for now.
It is spring! Each day more and more signs of warmer days are popping up everywhere. I see a tremendous difference even from just this weekend.
So Hello spring! Goodbye winter of 2010. Here are my favorite memories from this past winter.
Favorite Memory
Hands down, this would be the night that I had the opportunity to sit still and watch the snow falling to the ground. It was absolutely beautiful! I distinctly remember a peace that washed over me in that moment, a peace like I had never felt before. I have certainly been in such turmoil that I almost didn't know what to do with myself. I was giddy with joy! It was refreshing and welcomed. I remember feeling so overwhelmed with that very peace that I could barely keep it to myself. My husband allowed me to just sit beside the window and stay in that peaceful state with the snow for hours. It was a true gift and I will never forget that night as long as I live.
Favorite Song
I love music. It has been a big part of my life for a long time. We all have those songs that take us back to moments in time that are deep in our minds.
If forced to choose only one song to capture the feelings of this winter, I would have to say Only You by David Crowder.
Favorite T.V. Show
I really like Brothers and Sisters and House Hunters.
Favorite Food Out
Eggs Benedict. Not healthy I know, but oh so good. I never make them at home for myself so it is a nice treat.
Favorite Food Homemade
Linguine with White Clam Sauce
Variety of homemade soups
Shrimp and Grits
Favorite Purchase
A charm that has my word of the year hand stamped on it to remind me on a daily basis to "Let Go". It is helping to be able to hold the charm in my hands and rub my fingers over the words during the challenging moments that come my way. I also see the reflection of myself in the mirror wearing the word and I can now associate myself with that phrase and the true deep desire to "Let Go" of so much in my life...
Favorite Drink
I discovered Sipping Chocolate this year! MMMMmmm
Favorite Event
This winter the events that really stand out the most in my mind are the everyday, ordinary moments. I loved watching life unfold and discovering the everyday miracles that were right before my eyes. I feel like I didn't miss a moment and nothing went unnoticed by these new eyes. Many, but not all, of these moments were centered around my precious children, husband, extended family, friends, and people who enter my life for one reason or another. I am in awe...
If I had to name a few "big" events...
letting go and letting God...oh what an eye opener! He has shown me some amazing things this winter.
the blizzard of 2010-magical moments for my family. enough said.
watching the Winter Olympics in Vancouver
a holiday concert and yummy late night dinner and scrappin' with JC (girl time which was long overdue, it snowed, and I ate my favorite meal too :)
getting pampered beyond belief to attend the Casting Crowns concert with some very special friends and prayer warriors. What a night! It was so awesome to be alongside of so many people woshipping the Lord all at the same time! You are a gem SR! JN and KT, I am grateful you were both there to be a part of that memory in my heart.
planning and preparing a very special Valentine dinner for families that were in need of love and compassion. That night will remain close to my heart forever...
many others are to thank for helping to make that event possible
loving others
gosh...there are so many and I'm only supposed to name one!
I couldn't live without...
Well, I really don't like this question to be honest. I know...lighten up, it's a silly questionnaire with simple answers. Not for me. Yes, it is fun to document some feelings about the months that have passed to remember this person that I am in this very moment today. No, it is still not an easy question to answer. I have learned to live without the very thing that is most important to me, my child, my own flesh and blood. Not much else, tangibly speaking, matters anymore. The rest that really does matter, I have learned, are not under my control either. I am not in control of whether I get to live with or without them either. I have learned to cherish this moment today, it is all I have. I have learned to be at peace with that. I think. It is what it is...
Maybe this question was a little closer to the surface and not so deep. What items are important to you and are part of your daily life? (Aside from God and my family)
My bible
My devotional books
My camera
laptop
coffee and seltzer water
music
something on my person that incorporates all four of my children
So, now it is your turn. Let me know your favorites from this past winter season. Leave a comment here, e-mail me, write to me, call me. It will be the sunshine of my day.
I promise not to stay away for long. I've been writing all along and will post more to come. I have lots to say about this topic on "favorite things".
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Seeking Sunshine
The weeks been busier lately. The snow caused lots of things to need rescheduling and that ALL seemed to take place the last week in February, which seems like yesterday, but now it is March.
Some activities were blissful and refreshing and others caused my tendency toward deep reflectiveness to kick into high gear. Not to mention, having so many things scheduled caused a back up in the regular load of to dos on my list.
I woke up today tired and fighting emotions in my soul that if not taken care of could potentially rob me of having any joy today. God has gently used more than one circumstance this very week to show me that I am still stuck in a place of comparing my ugly insides to other's beautiful outsides. He also reminded me that I am looking too closely at the journey and the gifts of others rather than staying focused on my own. Don't we all do this to some degree or other? Why do we do it? It leaves us all in a state of discontentment and it robs our soul of the joy that God desires for us.
I made up my mind early this morning that I would refuse to let those negative and hurtful emotions to win. Today is a gift and I want to find and open the hidden joy waiting for me. I did what I have learned to do...seek the sunshine. It's there. It's always there. Some days I just have to work harder and look closer to find it. I did meet success and indeed found lots of sunshine this morning. At first I tried to play with my son at home and to get "lost" in his world. We tried playing with puzzles and reading books. No luck. We tried to watch a movie. No luck. We even tried to "clean" (my little guy loves water and a rag and will play independently for hours it would seem) our ABC letters on the fridge. No luck. I quickly realized that I would have to work harder today and determined that we physically needed to leave this house. AHH...victory at last!
I was seeking the sunshine today and I found it. I was seeking my savior's mercy and grace today and I found that too.
"You have a way of turning winter into spring.
Make something beautiful out of all this suffering.
Here I am once again in need of resurrection..."
Resurrection by Nicole Sponberg (this song is on my playlist)
I also needed to spend some time understanding MY journey today. I am reflecting on Exodus 23:29-30. I needed to be reminded that not all of God's solutions are instantaneously provided right when I want them to be delivered. God sees things far different than I do.
So as the sun reaches it's place to cast afternoon light and warmth on my deck, I will rest here. I will continue to work hard to stay on this course for the rest of the day because I am certain that those other emotions will try to wait and pounce on me later.
I am even sitting with my laptop facing the window so I can physically see the sunshine and feel it's warmth on my face and on my fingers as I type this post and share my thoughts.
Work.
HARD WORK.
Needful work.
Victory has already been won.
Let Go. Let Go. Let Go. Let Go. Let GO.
Some activities were blissful and refreshing and others caused my tendency toward deep reflectiveness to kick into high gear. Not to mention, having so many things scheduled caused a back up in the regular load of to dos on my list.
I woke up today tired and fighting emotions in my soul that if not taken care of could potentially rob me of having any joy today. God has gently used more than one circumstance this very week to show me that I am still stuck in a place of comparing my ugly insides to other's beautiful outsides. He also reminded me that I am looking too closely at the journey and the gifts of others rather than staying focused on my own. Don't we all do this to some degree or other? Why do we do it? It leaves us all in a state of discontentment and it robs our soul of the joy that God desires for us.
I made up my mind early this morning that I would refuse to let those negative and hurtful emotions to win. Today is a gift and I want to find and open the hidden joy waiting for me. I did what I have learned to do...seek the sunshine. It's there. It's always there. Some days I just have to work harder and look closer to find it. I did meet success and indeed found lots of sunshine this morning. At first I tried to play with my son at home and to get "lost" in his world. We tried playing with puzzles and reading books. No luck. We tried to watch a movie. No luck. We even tried to "clean" (my little guy loves water and a rag and will play independently for hours it would seem) our ABC letters on the fridge. No luck. I quickly realized that I would have to work harder today and determined that we physically needed to leave this house. AHH...victory at last!
I was seeking the sunshine today and I found it. I was seeking my savior's mercy and grace today and I found that too.
"You have a way of turning winter into spring.
Make something beautiful out of all this suffering.
Here I am once again in need of resurrection..."
Resurrection by Nicole Sponberg (this song is on my playlist)
I also needed to spend some time understanding MY journey today. I am reflecting on Exodus 23:29-30. I needed to be reminded that not all of God's solutions are instantaneously provided right when I want them to be delivered. God sees things far different than I do.
So as the sun reaches it's place to cast afternoon light and warmth on my deck, I will rest here. I will continue to work hard to stay on this course for the rest of the day because I am certain that those other emotions will try to wait and pounce on me later.
I am even sitting with my laptop facing the window so I can physically see the sunshine and feel it's warmth on my face and on my fingers as I type this post and share my thoughts.
Work.
HARD WORK.
Needful work.
Victory has already been won.
Let Go. Let Go. Let Go. Let Go. Let GO.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
