I'm Letting Go...

I posted earlier this month about my "word" for this year. I chose two words exactly, "Let Go". These words will hopefully be a theme that shapes some healing in 2010.

I was in a bookstore recently and happened upon a book by the author, Carol Kent, author of Now I Lay My Isaac Down, a book that truly changed my life. I didn't know that there had been a second follow up book written. I decided to resist the purchase, but later decided to go ahead and get the book knowing how much I had enjoyed the first book. I also knew from reading the title and a few excerpts in the store, that it would go along with my words "let go". The title of the book is A New Kind of Normal.

I guess I am finally taking the steps toward letting go of the life that I once knew. I am letting go of a life when I was the mother of four living children here on earth. I am still the mother of four children and I always will be. I suppose I am trying to better embrace the "new normal", I am the mother of three living children and one in heaven. Some may say, it is not a new normal since I have had this reality in my life for nineteen months. It is however a new normal for me because for the first time, I am realizing that I am ready to start accepting this reality and to move forward. I am moving forward with intense pain but thus moving forward. I cannot stay in the sixth month period of November 2007- June 2008 forever. Time really does move on and I suppose I should continue on this ride and see what life still has to offer. Better yet, I am opening my heart, learning to trust God more, and thus ready to see what He calls me to do, and how He will use my suffering to make something beautiful, as only He can.

So far, I must say that I am enjoying it as much as the first book. I have heavily highlighted and folded the corners of many pages. I was right and it is addressing many of those goals that I initially shared about letting go... I highly recommend it to anyone who is facing a life altering event in their lives.

The book dedication reads:

"To people who are living in their own "New Kind of Normal"
They have acknowledged that unexpected circumstances mean life will never be the same as it once was. Instead of running away or withdrawing to a prison of their own making, they choose to embrace the new opportunities and unexpected joys that can only be known by those who say:

I will survive.
I will persevere.
I will be vulnerable.
I will forgive.
I will trust.
I will hold those I love with open hands.
I will be thankful.
I will choose purposeful actions.

I salute you."

I wanted to say that this is not a book about grief. It is a book about life changing unexpectedly due to a variety of reasons. Carol Kent herself says that this book is about "choices-not the kind we place on goal charts, but the choices we all need to make when our carefully developed life plan takes a U-turn or comes to a sudden halt. It's about discovering fresh hope and renewed courage when we would rather give up. It's about willfully choosing to make the future better, even if we don't receive a tangible benefit for making the effort. It's about choosing not to waste the sorrow. It's about giving hope to others in the middle of our brokenness and tears, because it is all we have to offer. And because it is all we have to give, it is enough."

I wish I didn't need to quote so much text from the book to make my point. I can share my stories along the way of my journey, but I certainly do not possess writing skills like Carol Kent. I think that this book could really help others facing a difficult journey in life.

I'll share more about my experiences in life with choosing to LET GO as they happen.