Friday, November 19, 2010

Creating Sunshine

Creating Sunshine...well that has been my goal this month. I needed it to survive this month. I needed to actively seek out sunshine and freshen my perspective on life otherwise the pain would swallow me up. The pain is that big. It is that ugly.
It CAN also be that powerful. I still refuse to surrender to it completely. Some argue it is what I might try to heal. All this time, I really never have fully given in to it. I run from it. I try not to look at it too long. I try to change the subject. I try to see if it will be different tomorrow. I am falling faster and faster with Jeremy's birthday quickly approaching. In the midst of the fall I have noticed that I have for the first time seen growth and healing. I can also feel areas where I am falling right back into the trap of pain and unhealthy ways of coping.

Earlier this month I bought a present to remind myself that sunshine was indeed there each day for me to find, to unravel, to discover, and to enjoy.

How do you create sunshine? Please share...

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