Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Traffic Up Ahead

Dear Prayer Warriors,

I write tonight to petition you for prayers. We are heading into some tough days ahead, traffic if you will. You may recall from an earlier post that this visual was shared with us by grieving parents who were brave enough to dive in and help newly bereaved parents as they begin this new journey in life called grief.

I am "cocooning" as some of my friends call it. I am breathing in and out. I am literally putting one foot in front of the other and I am doing all I can to make it through the day. Times are tough. Times are hard for our nuclear family and extended family as well. I will ask you to pray for peace to fill our hearts as we approach these tough days and traffic up ahead.

This time last year we began this very painful journey. We prayed and had faith that God's will would be done. It was. We still cling tight to our faith and the belief that Jeremy still received his miracle, it just wasn't the same one we had so desperately prayed for.

I look ahead and see this traffic jam . I want so badly just to drive in another direction but I can't. We have no choice but to keep driving and embrace the traffic jam. I envision a pretty painful time to get through. We have come a long way. I know we will get through this traffic jam together, but it won't be without pain and many tears...

Thank you.

With a Grateful Heart,

2 comments:

salekelas said...

Amy,

God has carried you this far; He's not gonna drop you now!! I know words from a stranger won't heal your broken heart, but please know that you and your family are still in my daily prayers.

Your Sister in Christ,
Christie

Anonymous said...

Oh sweet warrior,
I wish so much for you that your miracle had come through the way you dreamed it would. As encouraged as I am by God's presence in my life and in your storm, as is made apparent through your postings, I struggle to understand the pains of life. I want you to know that there isn't a day that goes by that I don't gaze in my children's eyes and think of the pain you must feel in your loss, as I wonder how I would ever carry on without them. I guess that's why my heart longs to comfort yours...as I know I would need it just the same if ever I am in your shoes. Every time I begin to grieve over what could happen to my little precious angels, God reminds me to close my eyes, soak in the moment, and live HIS dreams. As said in that song I sent you, He is "the dream that is still alive". He calls us to do what seems impossible at times, I agree. How hard it is to live a dream that He has give us only to have it seemingly taken away.

As I waited for my son to have a minor surgery this morning my mind began going places and thinking, what if? They said there is little risk with the anesthesia, but what if he falls into that small category of children who can't handle it? What if a 20 minute procedure turns into a nightmare similar to what you have experienced?? It was then that I looked up and spotted 3 sunflower balloons in the hallway in front of me. Oddly they didn't seem to have a place there. They weren't in a gift shop, tied to a wheelchair, or with a person's belongings. They simply were floating in the corridor by the front door...for whatever the reason may be. And they were huge, I will have you know! The balloon itself was a sunflower and in place of a ribbon the string was a stem of the flower. I almost wanted to grab them and find a way to bring them to you!! It was one of those moments that Jesus had tucked in His cloak that he snuck in to remind me of his presence! Of course everything went fine this morning with Simon's surgery, but I know that there may come the day when that is not the case. Whatever the plan may be for my children's lives, I hope and pray every day that I may accept it, embrace it, and continue on the road the Lord has for me. You are an inspiration in just your ability to do that, Amy. Whether you know it or not.

With that, I pray that in your cocoon time you will find the strength you need to make it through the traffic. I will pray for you every day as I know God will be shaping your wings and getting you ready to fly at the first hint of spring's warmth. Hang in there! You are not in your cocoon alone...you can NEVER escape the Lord's grasp. In fact, He IS your cocoon. Rest in His embrace and let Him do His masterful work. Traffic can be one of those hidden gifts as it sometimes helps slow us down when we are trying to speed through our days. Though it is also quite frustrating while you are in it!! As you hit that traffic, I will pray that you can roll down your window, stick your hand out, and let the rays of sunshine and the breeze flow through your fingers as a little child longing for the spring!

In Christ,
Julie